Back from the ashes...!!!

Something returned back. I heard someone laughing... felt someone crying. I saw my reflection in the mirror. Wounds of my yesterday were very clear. I know the reason, I am the reason.

"Does that hurts???"

This question realised me of the tacit agreement between my heart and body. My heart was no different from my body. Whenever it hurts, first instants - numbness overtakes my pain. It may be bleeding, but the pain was unknown. So was the case with my heart. Even yesterday numbness was ruling my heart, but today numbness is making way for pain...

The first time in my life I felt 'regret'. 'Regret !!!' Errr....!! This was once a word which I could not even spell. But today I feel its an integral part of my nightmares... I should have done little more to achieve... My memoirs even though transient, hurt my mind and force me to be seditious.

Its a very special scenario. Some people can’t be forgotten. They shouldn't be remembered either. They just exist in our lff, like Spam mails, that we keep on pulling to junk everyday and they keep on coming in inbox the next day.

Ppl said, I am getting 'more' emotional. I laughed! *Sigh!!*. Emotional and me?? I remember the story once my grandma said of 'Lord Shiva', who gone mad and 'jus roked the whole world' when he lost his 'life' in the form of 'Sathi'. Dare to compare that emotion with my emotion... ??!!

You may say aaghh...a granny story. I say, my life's also a story... & even yours..!!

If you try to see it from a second person's angle, believe me you can laugh even at your tragedies... Sometimes its real fun going to sleep and knowing I get to wake up tomorrow and I don't know whether I have a tomorrow? Life is strange.... may be that's why I love it. As if a stranger who sometime laugh at me, sometime stare in the face & some time put some mark as he passes by...

Today Lff to me is like a staring stranger... who watches carefully... My every single movement is under his surveillance... I hate being under some bodies surveillance but I have to live with it. That stranger is my Lff....

I don't want to concentrate much on that stranger...

Now, right now… finding a purpose and healing myself; mentally, physically, and emotionally... tats most important in my life......once I can do that,

I want again love to take over....!!!

A jump back to the known horizon, horizon of love... & then I say I'm back... 'Back from the ashes...!!'

" Get back from the ashes as soon as possible... "

" Very Easy.....?? "

" Don't know!! "

" Even I !! " :|

" n some people say 'nothing is impossible...'; 'the fast its better...' "